So easily we have fallen into the pattern of celebrating children's day... many of us, even in our 20s, feel that thin thread connecting us with our childhood give a little twang when children's day arrives. We love reminiscing about how November 14 used to be a celebratory day in school - a break from the usual routine. Now although, as I look back on school days, even the "usual routine" was so much more fun than what today's "usual routine" actually is.
Childhood is a fantasy world... the constant sense of discovery of the tiniest things left our curious little minds wondering for hours. With time the little revelation would get twisted into a fantastic thing, and the mind would be on a trapeze, jumping from one thought to the next, spiraling into an imagery, a fusion of brilliant possibilities and happenings...
Having embraced adulthood, with increased sense of perception and understanding, there are few things that amaze us in that wondrous way. With our exposure and learning, it seems as if the only things that are still left to the imagination are the deeply perverse and dark, which we never hope happens to us...
And somehow between all the struggle, the confusion, the wondering, the depression, the confusion (again!) deep down, we know we have one set of people constant in our lives, to help us out, to guide us through, to bear the brunt for us when the going gets too tough! Our parents are like these silent puppeteers in the background, stringing along the threads, and helping us dance through this madness called Life!
They make you believe no problem is big enough that it can't be solved, no mistake can be ever grave enough that it would break the relation between you and them, there's no match to the selfishness that comes to their fore when there's something concerning US, their children's' welfare... then no prize can be good enough, no necessities luxurious enough, no facilities comfortable enough... It is for us that they keep driving themselves - we may define is as a way of life, but really, who are they actually doing it for?? Had it been for their own self - gratification, there would be no fixed deposits they would be taking sacrificing their own present enjoyments, no insurance policies to handle problems immediately when at bay - we would in-fact having an anti- parent, the one who would live for the moment and expect us to make a living for ourselves right from scratch.
At least in the Indian setup, I believe, the idea of assets passing from generation to generation still holds quite strongly. One way or the other, either we're born with a silver spoon, or we have our parents make one for us.
And still, their work started long long back! Suddenly, with our arrival, they had this responsibility that was too big to fathom. So we have dads cooing to understand our first words, we have the mothers trying to read through the incessant crying. We have both trying to understand our lisped words; our unattractive building of clay becomes the best Picasso work for them, and the smallest gesture of getting a glass of water for them becomes the biggest delight!
Through our teenage years, they brace themselves for the caustic mood swings we go through, when nothing they do can be good enough, and everything they say becomes an anti-teen way of life!
And then life comes a full circle, and also in this blog, when we reach our twenties, and begin to depend on them again. "What if I do this?" I think, and Pop says, "but beta won't that be better?" And I think " wow! will I ever be able to think like that??"
Mom's advice suddenly becomes word of law, and you react scornfully when your younger sibling acts like your bygone self - and don't you wish he/she saw in your mom/dad - what you can heartily appreciate now!
On Children's day I saw umpteen sets of parents prance around their wealth of joy, dapperly dressed, buying them little gifts, taking them for outings, making them feel special in whatever way possible. No demand was given a No, 14th November, becomes every kid's birthday!
And if we are so special to our parents, without doing anything much at all other than, well, being their kids, (and kids we will always be to them, even if we are 50!)... and if we can be pampered so much, then it makes much more sense to have a true celebration of Parents Day!!
How about a nice card to our parents appreciating them for their love and understanding? How about a day of listening to your parent's wishes and demands, and making them feel like a kid! A day when we ask them to take a break, relax, and we handle the mundane household chores. The celebration needn't be big, but the gesture, the underlying thought, might just work wonders to make them feel special. Even if we just listen to their preachings, actually LISTEN, it might make just make their day!Observe your mother, look at the things that make her laugh... she would look wonderfully beautiful in that moment of innocent happiness... Or your dad, who has a tough exterior, but inside he's such a softie he could make your heart melt. Their demands extremely measured, their expectations very little. Even fulfilling all those, even once a year, would be a great move!
More than children, we are now in a position to become their best confidantes. Maybe for some it has already happened, maybe its in transition for rest. But what we can imbibe in ourselves now is a sense of responsibility... for our loving, still 'young' parents.
